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Monday, April 30, 2012

Cougar or Kitten?

So the current trend seems to be for women to date younger men. Guys like that whole "cougar" image when they date an older, experienced woman and those same women like the boost of self esteem & excitement a younger man can provide. Young guys can be really impressed with our knowledge and the old double standard where a woman loses points for sexual experience is wiped away- in fact, it becomes an asset. I once knew a guy named Maurino- a hot young college guy who was 12 yrs younger than me. So hot that he was model material. He was Greek for chrissake. I was at a time in my life when I was fresh out of a long relationship, had relocated to a different state and I admit, he was exactly what I needed at that time in my life. Someone young, fun and handsome to rebound with- friggin’ perfect! However, it turned stale like old toast really fast. It was tough to relate to someone when my day consisted of working 9-6 in a hectic, demanding wall-street paced office and he was going to class with 20-somethings and playing basketball every day. I would say to people "can’t hang out tonite, seeing young guy tonite after his basketball game" and they would beg for a chance to meet his friends. My sister and her friends saw him at the gym and high-fived me when they realized he was my latest conquest. Most of my friends were in long relationships or married- and the idea of me dating someone out of my age group really intrigued them. People even compared me to Demi Moore at the time- but we all know how well her relationship ended. She's probably still doing whippets while en route to her plastic surgeon's office.  After awhile, the shallowness of it all overshadowed the initial excitement and when he moved back home to Virginia after college, neither of us kept in touch. I guess we both knew inside that it had run it’s course and had fun while it lasted. You can only play so much minigolf…

Older guys are a whole different ballgame! Older guys have "been there", "done that"- where younger guys "will do that someday". With older guys you get more of the full package in my opinion- and who doesn’t want the full package?! The downfall is the age difference can backfire if the older person advises too much on life. Being irresponsible (hey, I’m a Saggitarius- it’s not my fault!), the last thing you want to hear is a reminder on what you should be doing or how to do it. If an older guy conjures up images of your dad reminding you to be responsible- the younger woman will rebel and do the exact opposite or completely lose interest. However, unlike young guys- older guys tend to have their lives more "together". You go into their bathrooms and find nice towels vs a dirty beach towel hanging up. They actually have more groceries in their fridge than beer.  They know how to hold a job so you aren’t always counseling them like you would with a young guy who has no idea what they want in life (aside from the best basketball score in tonite’s game of course). Older guys know cool stuff you never heard of- older music, films, secret outdoor spots he’s found and wants to share with you - anything to broaden your own horizons. Let’s face it, young guys are exhausting- you can only teach someone so much without feeling like their mother or older sister. Older guys have a career established already and other women they have been with have taught them how NOT to treat women. They’ve already learned the hard way what happens when you blow a woman off. Or not to forget a woman’s pet’s birthday. If they say they are free saturday, they are free Saturday- no ifs ands or buts about it.  Women like the chivalry that older men often show and they like the fact that older men tend to have more respect for them.  Women like men who know how to be men. He’s not out on the prowl at bars every nite looking for a fresh piece, he just wants to hang with you, the hot younger woman he’s been thinking of all day. Some people lose their lust for life at a certain age but if you’re seeing an older guy who has still "got it", you know in another 20 yrs, he will still be enjoying life as much as you are- time does not slow him down. Older guys also usually have had their kids by now- kids who are old enough that they have kids of their own… leaving plenty of time for  YOU. And last but certainly not least... older guys are the best in the sack- because they have done it all and mastered their skills.

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